It was like running in a total darkness, never knowing where your path is and you don't know when the lights will come. I thought I was not gonna make it, but I did.
Now I don't know how will I ever survive in the real world. I don't know where to go and where to start. I don't know what to do. My mind is in a complete chaos and I am so confused.
I want to be positive about anything and everything but deep beneath me is a girl that doubts herself. A girl who thinks she's not worth it.
Last night, I had a misunderstanding with my dad and the voice inside myself told me to cut myself, so I did. It was painful but It was satisfying. Somehow the pain in my heart faded away.
I went outside and took my dog away for a walk. We were sitting under the sky and the sky last night was just like my life. No moon, no stars, no light. Just plain dull sky.
It made me cry even more. I felt like no one cares. I felt like I'm all alone and in so much pain. All I have that night is my dog, and the cut on my wrist. I watch it as it bleeds and I cry even more.
Right now, I feel like my whole life is falling apart and I don't know how to stand and fix it.
All I know is that I'm shattered into pieces.